I’m housesitting for Matt & Richelle tonight. I’m not sure if they know I’m here.
I’m so mad at Austin! Tuesday night and yesterday I was so happy because I stood up for myself to him for the first time. Tonight I didn’t and I feel crummy. He followed me home and asked if I was irritated if he did, and I said yes, and he just smiled and shrugged. Like, “too bad!” The jerk. And he says he puts others’ feelings ahead of his own. Ha!
I wish I wouldn’t have hung around talking to him at the meeting. I didn’t feel like it. I felt obligated, though, because I didn’t want it to look like I didn’t like him anymore. I didn’t listen to my heart. That’s a sin, because my heart is so important! I love it when I listen to my heart. I wish Austin would too. GRRR.
I’m having breakfast with Wayne tomorrow. I’m excited. I’ll get to talk to him about everything. I love talking to Jehovah about it too. It really made me feel good. At least, my handwriting’s optimistic! That’s a good sign.
CARE
I skinned my knee
Take care of me
I fell, I hurt
I’m covered with dirt
I bleed, I cry
And you demand why
You say the fault is mine
But you won’t take the time
To care about my heart
With yours you always start
So here I lay
Mangled and frayed
Drawing my breath through my teeth
Braced to stand on my feet
Holding my head up high
I allow you to see me cry
While I tenderly bandage my knee
I’ll show you how to care for me.
We were in some sort of a futuristic place. There was a tight, enclosed subway/train area with only the tracks and a narrow walkway. I was there with Jarrod, Austin, and some other people.
We were all standing around talking and suddenly Jarrod decided to run after the train and jump on the back of it. Austin tried to stop him, yelling at him, because it was really easy to get seriously hurt or electrocuted, even to slide under the tracks. Austin ran after him to pull him off, yelling. Jarrod wasn’t getting off, though, and Austin was getting dangerously close. I grabbed him and held him back, and he started screaming and fighting. Somehow we both knew something horrible was going to happen, but I didn’t want Austin to have to watch it. With him kicking and screaming, I dragged him out of there and into the fresh night air, wishing I had my communicator to call a security or medical team.
Later we could stand on a hill and look down into the subway/train area, and we saw Jarrod’s body stretched out on the tracks surrounded by medical personnel. He was unconscious, and half his leg had been cut off. He had other injuries and we weren’t sure if he was going to make it.
Later I was with my parents in a car and we were in Seattle. We were looking for something but I was just staring at the beautiful houses.